Clash of the Champions 9 Page 2
He wrestled under a variation of his real name, and the newest Skyscraper was "Mean" Mark Callous. I’m sure you know what became of him after that. Anyway, back to this match: Sid tags in and misses a blind charge, but the Skyscrapers manage to gain control of Scott anyway. Spivey hits a tilt-a-whirl slam and big boot. Scott comes back with a vertical suplex and Steinerline, and makes the hot tag to Rick. Steiners put Sid out, and Rick hits a belly-to-belly on Spivey as Doom runs in for the DQ at 5:02. Amazingly, Scott catches Simmons with a Frankensteiner in mid-run from an impossible angle. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO HIM? Woman’s new bodyguard, Nitron, debuts and joins in the brawl. Nitron was the guy who was Super Destroyer in the last match. So what, you say? Well, Nitron’s real name is Tyler Mane, and he’s the guy who played Sabretooth in the X-Men movie. So there you go. **
- US title match: Lex Luger v. Brian Pillman. Long tie-up sequence to start. Crowd chants for Luger, so he tells them to shut up. That’ll learn ‘em. Pillman gets two dropkicks and Luger bails. Back in, Luger punishes him with rights, but Pillman uses his speed to escape. Luger bails again to regroup, and overpowers Pillman. Pillman retaliates with some CANADIAN VIOLENCE, and Luger tosses him. Pillman hangs out and skins-the-cat back in, then nails a spinkick. Luger retreats again, completely negating those face pops he was getting. Pillman goes up and hits a missile dropkick for two, and some more chops. He rams Luger’s arm into the post and they brawl outside. Back in, Pillman works the arm. Luger comes back with a backdrop suplex and a running kick to the head. Two points! Long press slam is followed by a Warrior gorilla press. Two big elbows, but Pillman fights back. Luger dumps him, and slams him on the floor. He suplexes him back in for two. Pillman suddenly gets a cradle for two, but Luger powerslams him to set up the Rack. He takes too long posing, and Pillman cradles him again. A vicious slugfest ends in Pillman’s favor (and not just the usual WWF "I block your punch, you don’t block mine" type one either – this was a pretty even fight) and he comes back. Backdrop sets up a flying bodypress, but the ref is bumped in the process. Rollup, no ref. Luger bails, grabs a chair, and absolutely destroys Pillman with a chairshot for the pin at 12:53. Great match. **** Sting saves Pillman from further punishment. Man, hindsight being 20/20, they should have put the title on Pillman before pushing Luger to the top again.
- "I Quit" Match: Ric Flair v. Terry Funk. Loser must retire here. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! A Flair chop sends Funk over the top. Back in, more chops. No one ever said Funk couldn’t take it LIKE A MAN, that’s for sure. Funk bails and Flair follows, continuing the chops. Into the ring, Funk goes to the eyes and kicks him like an egg-sucking dog. Flair comes back with a chop, but Funk sucks it up and tosses Flair. He pounds him on the railing, then nails him with the mike. Flair chops back, and back in we go. Funk pounds away, but gets atomic-dropped. Flair puts his head down and takes a neckbreaker, thus playing off the injury Funk gave him to set up this whole feud. They fight outside. Funk runs back in, but Flair pulls him out and keeps punishing him with those chops. He tries to choke Terry into submission back in the ring, but Gary Hart distracts him and Funk comes back. Another neckbreaker sets up a weak-looking piledriver (after Funk offers Flair a chance to say "I Quit" first). Funk always use that lame Memphis piledriver where they overcompensate for injury and just kinda fall back. I hate that one. I was just watching the Best of Dynamite Kid compilation from RF Video tonight, and he absolutely killed Tiger Mask with that inverted cradle piledriver that Jerry Lynn won the title with at the PPV. Now THAT’S how to piledrive someone. Now where was I…oh, yeah, Flair won’t quit, so Funk drops a leg and tries again. Funk tosses him out and piledrives him on the floor, still no quit in Flair. Funk slams him on a table at ringside, but Flair fights back. He rams Funk into the table, then sends Funk sliding over the table and back to the floor. Flair kills Gary Hart for good measure, then crotches Funk on the railing. Back in, Flair goes to the kneedrop and atomic drop, then Jim Ross nearly has an orgasm as Flair starts to work on the leg. He does a wicked awesome sequence where he alternates chopping Funk and kicking him in the leg, leaving the poor guy to run away in pain and confusion. Flair tackles him on the floor and gives him a kneebreaker on the floor. High suplex back into the ring, and it’s figure-four time. Funk fights it off and retreats, but Flair suplexes him over the top and to the apron, then hits some absolutely surgical chops. Funk is done, and Flair slaps on the figure-four and holds on for a good two minutes until Funk says "I quit" at 18:33. Funk and Flair shake hands, then Hart punks out Funk. Muta joins the attack, taking out Flair, and Sting makes the save. Lex Luger then nails everyone with a chair to set up the disastrous Iron Man tournament at Starrcade 89. The match here, though, was an awesomely intense and violent brawl, unmatched by almost any brawl done by Flair. *****
The Bottom Line: Hey, it’s Clash IX. This show has a reputation for a reason, and it’s because of two great matches and a killer Midnight Express heel turn. As an overall show, it’s kinda weak, but that’s picking nits.
Strongly recommended.